The friend can do for his friend what he cannot do for himself. He can give him counsel in time of difficulty; he can teach him ‘to see himself as others see him’; he can stand by him, when all the world are against him; he can gladden and enlighten him by his presence; he ‘can divide his sorrows,’ he can ‘double his joys;’ he can anticipate his wants.
--- from "The Complete Works of Plato"
How many of us have the treasure of such a friendship? I wonder about the so-called modern age. Does its very nature throw up obstacles to deep and abiding relationships? Are we in a frenzied world of information/disinformation overload? Are we occupied with advertising, influencers, alerts on our phones, mountains of emails, the latest podcasts? Are we hyper focused on success? Do we even wedge in moments for prayer, contemplation, spirituality? Where is our focus?
Instead of caring and tending to actual relationships, are our days too filled, too busy?
But then, it occurs to me our first friendship needs to be with ourselves. All those things suggested in the quote from the book on Plato can also apply to our relationship with ourselves. As Jesus and Leviticus said, "Love your neighbor as yourself." I would go so far to say that if you do not love yourself, it is not possible to fully b love your neighbor. That tricky little word "as"tells us a huge truth. I love others as I love myself. I'm hard on myself for this or that reason. My neighbor does that very thing that upsets me about myself, and I go ballistic.
Jesus gave us a trail of clues to remedy the "as" problem. One was telling us to get the log out of our own eye before trying to get the speck out of our neighbor's eye. Another was not to judge by appearances, but use righteousness judgement. Another was to love one another as he loved you. Look, and you will find a lot more.
Lord, teach me to be a good and true friend for myself, so that I can also be a good and true friend to others.
