This morning I was pondering the phenomenon of bias & circumstantial "evidence."
When a person makes life-altering decisions based on circumstantial "evidence" & refuses to hear any ideas to the contrary, what seems to me to be revealed are already held biases, perhaps deep in the subconscious. The person selects from the array of things on the table only those that uphold the deep seated biases.
It is sad at so many levels. The person making the bias-driven decision cuts off some part of his/her life that could be wonderful, or it could be awful if the bias is born out to be related to fact. One interesting thing is that the decision based on bias rarely offers the opportunity to revisit it all cleanly, without bias, so the person may never know what is actually going on. Those people & options that are cut off suffer in varying degree. If those cut off do not want to be cut off, they suffer to the degree they want to stay. If they don't care, they can easily brush it off & walk off into a more welcoming place.
In my life, I have had some of these situations occur. I am not quite sure why. My dear husband says it is because of the light emanating from my connection to God which triggers & stirs up the darkness in some people. I don't know, but I do know I've experienced such events way more than anyone else I know.
At one level it is interesting, a study in human interactions & choices. At another, it is hurtful, the more there is originally a feeling of love & connection, the more hurtful. It is perplexing, difficult, challenging, etc. You name it.
Part of the hurt is the recognition that the person has this negative bias against you which leads the hostile decisions, false accusations & shunning behavior. It does not seem possible to argue facts against a strong underlying bias. One cannot get into the other's subconscious mind in normal relationship. That is, you cannot just go around hypnotizing others to change their subconscious.
So, what to do? My choice is to turn to God. I believe there are lessons & opportunities in every moment, in every experience - however positive or negative they may be. I may not see them right now, not even for a long time, but they are there. If I truly believe God is always present, then I have to know that even in this, God is present.
My beloved Father, my Friend, my constant Companion, my Guide, my Inspiration - lead me to know You in every moment & every situation. Show me how You would have me deal with even the darkest & deepest of challenges. Help me always remember that my life is about You & shining Your Light the best I can. So I see that in dark valleys, Your Light is most needed. Give each of us the courage to shine, no matter where we find ourselves. Help us light up those dark valleys through which we all trod here on earth. I see now that is why we sometimes are in such a place, for You trust us to shine Your Light so that the valley is no longer without light. Help me keep this truth close to my heart. I ask this in the name of Christ & seal it with the ancient seal of faith, Amen, Amen & Amen