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Wednesday, September 26, 2012

A Note for My Grandchildren

My beloved grandchildren, I pray that one day you will find my blog and website and books and discover who your grandmother was. I leave a bit so that you can know something about someone who loves you with all of her heart. My DNA is in you, and so part of me lives on in you. The DNA of our ancestors is dancing in you too. It could be interesting to you to find out what influences are at work in you from your family that has gone before you.

It was a deeply painful day when you were taken from my life. It was over a misunderstanding, misinformation and decisions made on this lack of clarity. Even these years later. I can scarcely believe it happened. I hold no anger, for Christ taught us to forgive and to love. I know that such cruelty and rage come from someone who has some inner work to do, so I pray daily for your father. I miss you and weep often. I wonder how you are, where you are and if you think of me.

I pray you express the wondrous gifts that God has placed in you. I pray you have a fabulous life. I pray that joy and love and wisdom and peace walk with you.

If you find this little blog before I leave this life, I hope and pray you will find me and once again we can hug and talk and do loving and happy things together. If not, know that I have joined the cloud of witnesses watching over you. My love is with you always.

God bless you and keep you.

Monday, September 24, 2012

Autumn So Many Ways

It is autumn at so many levels. The weather is about to cool. Leaves are about to become jaw-dropping colors. The pace of growth is about to slow, getting ready for the sleep of winter.

The rhythm of our planet is once again being true to itself. The seasons we number 4  rotate regularly into place. It is comforting to know the rhythm and not expect spring when it is autumn. We trust what is to follow. 

There is a rhythm in our lives too. I could say that I am in the autumn of this leg of my eternal life. I know God created me - you -everyone. I know we have eternal souls. Our bodies are like spacesuits our souls wear to navigate earth. Our bodies belong here and will stay here. They are carbon compounds. As they age, they begin to break down. They begin to slow down. My body surely is.

BUT, my soul is not slowing down. It is not subject to earth's rules. My soul quickens and jumps and dances with ever expanding understanding and at the same time ever expanding questions/quests. I feel excitement about what I know and know that I know and even more excitement about what I do not yet know. God, being Infinite in Nature, can never be known fully, for then God would be finite - containable into some sort of box or the other. Right around the corner, maybe today, is the next aha waiting for me. 

One of my main stated goals for this life is to go as far spiritually as I can. In the service of this goal, I have been led to many places, many people, many books, many churches, many ideas. I have sought, considered, discarded, accepted, been saddened by, been exhilarated by and so much more. The journey has not been boring. Sometimes perplexing, sometimes clear - but never boring. I am pretty sure that since this has been a life-long, up until now, pattern that it will continue until my winter of sleep comes, and I (my soul) leave this planet for God only knows what.

In the meantime, I will engage fully in the autumn and all it offers. I accept the gorgeous colors of a fading life and the enrichment to the core of me that comes in autumn time. 

Lord, I know You are here with me in the autumn of my earthly life, just as You have been through every moment of every season. Open my mind, my heart, my very depths to You in every way possible to a person on earth. Help me embrace the colors of my autumn. Help me come to understand what You bring to me to understand. Lead me where You would. Your Will be done now for every millisecond. I turn my life and this prayer over to You. Amen