When we hold grudges and grievances against ourselves or others, it does not matter against whom, guess what happens? We suffer! Our minds suffer from the pain, sorrow and confusion. Our bodies suffer from the added stress and the extra chemicals running through them as a result of the anger and fear. Our spiritual life suffers because we cannot think of and experience God that is love simultaneously with our anger. Love and anger cannot coexist in the same thought. We waste a precious moment that will never come again when we indulge in the opposite of God’s Love. We lose out on so much life when we do not forgive. --- Marlene Oaks, "The Key- Forgiveness and Beyond"
Preparing for my sermon April 7th, I decided to reread my book on forgiveness so as to bring to the forefront of my mind the things I wrote. that so many have said helped them. I have become an expert regarding forgiveness, as I've done so much of it, out of necessity really.
One of the salient points is that by not forgiving, we are the person who gets hurt, as per my excerpt above.
Ask yourself the Jesus question "Do you wish to be healed?" Are you willing to live the life of a healed person? You might be surprised at the people who have told me no. They didn't want to be that person, to give up their story, to take on adult responsibilities.
I have come to know this earthly life is a school for souls. So we can use the Socratic method of questions on ourselves. Such as: What am I to learn from this? What are other ways to look at this? (Think of as many ways as you can, brainstorm with yourself)
Counsel yourself. Use affirmations such as: It's not going on right now. I'm all right right now. Thank you for teaching/testing me. I bless and release this person/situation to God. I forgive you and release you. I forgive and release myself.
Pray heartfeltly, sincerely, turning your pain over to God to grant grace and resurrection power.
Read my book. 😍