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Thursday, March 28, 2019

Crevices

As a person who has a long trail of solving, overcoming, untangling problems, there are times my usual skills do not apply. It is a bit disorienting. Even as a child I frequently heard from my friends, "you are a lifesaver."

I'm in one of the major crevices of my life, and have been for over 5 years. How I speak of it to myself defines it and leads me to different places. Sometimes I am an observer, watching in fascination. Sometimes I am accutely aware of profound spiritual lessons. On occasion I am distressed, angry, feeling helpless. There are moments I feel imprisoned by my decreased options.

"How does one overcome the powerful who hold the strings of my assets?" "Is there anything I can do?" But there doesn't seem to be something in my toolbox for life that applies.

Mostly I align with the idea that I will not give them my mind, my heart, my participation in life. I will keep on being me. I will keep on sharing and caring the best I can. Some days I drag myself into life, oh so weary, but I go out and do what I can.

Daily for months now I hear that tomorrow or Monday or some for sure day is the day I get it all back, including compensation for what they've done to us. It is sort of torture. Isn't torture illegal?

Surely any moment I'll get to climb out of this crevice and back to my full speed. I think of Paul often, "This too shall pass."

When we find ourselves in a crevice, we can remember it has a shelf life and so will end. We climb out wiser, stronger, more in tune with God and ready to soar into life. Climb with me.

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