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Monday, September 9, 2024

The Past and Now, A Different Angle

 It has long been my understanding that we need to resolve our past issues so as to not drag them into our now and distort it. Yesterday I got a glimmer of a new idea, or a slightly different angle, along that line from a novel I started reading,"An Echo in Time."

Basically, the idea is that some of the patterns in our lives can be unresolved issues of our ancestors, recent or even centuries ago.

That struck a note of recognition. My mother's father put a bullet to his brain in front of my mother, when she was 7. I saw the direct influence that had on her and her sister, mother, aunt, and later to my dad, etc.

But then, yesterday I saw a direct line to me from my grandfather. When there were times in the past that I felt hopeless and thought of giving up, I thought of him and made a choice to not give in and so not carry his hopeless forward. He had just been ripped off by his business partner and lost his fortune; his wife was mentally ill; his son was dead. He apparently talked himself into deep hopelessness and gave his life to it.

In my children and in myself, I see resilience. We have walked some very deep valleys, and we kept on walking. Also, we have strong faith. I don't know about my grandfather's faith, but I assume, if he had some, it faltered.

I am going to consider some of the other, strange and seemingly out of left field, patterns in my life through this lens. Are there other family issues trying  to resolve themselves through me? 

Or is it just the human lessons we all came to earth to learn? Are our lives not so different? Is it just earth-school for all of us? Maybe it's not my family issues afterall.



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